My Ideal Woman... Betty

Well i know Betty from Archie's is ideal woman not just for me but for millions of nice guys out there who grew up reading about archie and his stupid antic's ( Ok there will be a section in the audience who will wanna counter me on being a nice guy).

But you know what i realised in the past couple of years and 4 girls later, dreams is so dis-jointed from reality, i mean true time and time again people keep telling each other to loosen up their search criteria, but damn what should people do who don't have a search criteria.

I mean all i want my girl to be is too look decent, i really don give a flying rats ass if she is fat or anorexic, i prefer the former to the latter, have a thing for women with glasses and weird teeth, yea call me weird, but am just looking out for the girl next door, you know in a T-shirt, hair tied up in a pony tail with whom i can call her out for a game of cricket or basket ball, and let her win if she really sucks at it not before i try and act all macho by pullin out some wicked tricks. And who cracks real funny jokes on me, cause let me say it out once and for all i try to be cool but i aint, not a bit not even close. But she shouldn make me feel bad about it she should make me laugh about it.

I want my girl to be smart, not in a mensa club honorary member types but some one with common sense, who can talk about stuff anything and everything, who doesn't feel bad about what she feels and why she feels. But it is very important that she should feel.

I mean i agree there are no longer no sane women left in this world, and all of them suffer from some form of depression or the other and am ok with that, as long as they do not make it a means of garnering attention. Though i don't expect her to have confidence levels of that of a miss universe or miss world but enough that when she walks with me she is not scared that i will go and cheat with the first girl whose gonna spread her legs in front of me.

I mean she should be sweet enough to hide the fact that am a loser when it comes to proclaiming my love and all that mushy crap, and not laugh at my face when i make an effort which always turn out to be one of those lame ass attempts which on hind-sight make me cringe and usually change my stoned look to one of constipated one.

Well i think such a woman dosen't exist only, maybe am just a loser whose been socially conditioned by the fact that there is someone for everyone ( but how the hell is that possible with such dis-proportionate gender ratios ) guess guys like me are the ones who will keep saying " Mera # ayega zaroor ayega " just to keep giving ourselves false hopes.

But i think i have become disillusioned by the entire thing called love now, it doesn't exist. And as i say this i can hear the himalayas screaming my name as if it just had its first orgasm, well i aint going to the himalaya's neither am i falling for this love bullshit crap.

I think i did not wanna be single but now am embracing it grudgingly cause there aint no other option left for me now is there?

So here i am burying all hopes and dreams of making my love story into a motion picture ( i wonder is there something inherently worng with me, i mean everything i say somehow reminds me of food or sex or shit or maybe am still a caveman ) since there aint no love story moron... !!!

Singledom here i come...