Thursday, 26 February 2009

Epiphany

Whilst listening to Tonic's 'If you could only see', I realized that am not that good at being single. Am not good at handling being lonely, and neither am I good at being intimate, it really is a catch – 22 situation if you ask me. You know I think am more comfortable with being uncomfortable in an intimate situation than being uncomfortable whilst being alone. When I say intimate am not talking about no cloths, being butt naked, am comfortable doing that but it is baring my heart and soul to somebody that kind of makes me uncomfortable. And nothing has driven this point home better than all the many women who I have been seeing in the last few months, I suck at being single and I suck at being with people who don't get that am not stock material.

And I think the biggest reason why I feel alone in a sea of beautiful women, some with awesome racks and asses and brains for some of them is the fact that nobody gets the fact that I am not your stereotypical alpha male, neither am I your stereotypical geeky nice guy. I am a bit of both, the quantities of each in this mixture which is me varies on time, season, mood and many, many unknown variables. And the person who gets the components which is going into this complex compound which is me definitely gets to see the best side of me. The ones who don't, I don't blame them because I really don't make it easy for them, I make life more difficult for them to deal with me than normal circumstances. There are these whole load of small things which are not really small… But I guess am just rambling… blame it on the whole single bit…Guess the only thing to do is man it up and go get laid…

Cheerios… hope couple of drinks and some floozie gets me off this fuck all mood…


 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

but i know you are a bit of both chomu. i know you better than you know yourself...