2008 – A year best forgotten

Well, lot of people say life can change in an instant. Well, in my case my life has turned around on its head in over a year. This would be probably be the first time since 2001 that I would be celebrating as a single bachelor. This year is probably the year best forgotten, why you may ask, and there is no better way to explain it than do a comparison with the previous year gone by.

2007	2008
Saw me shift from Chennai to Bangalore	Saw me shift my place of residence. Twice.
Was going out 3 days in a week, getting drunk, getting laid. (You do the math)	Went out thrice in the whole year, never got laid.
Increased my drinking binges from 24 hours to 72 hours.	Decreased my drinking from a bottle to 3 drinks
Missed having any real good friends in Bangalore	Saw Asif (the sole good friend and roommate) leave, fought with Dominic
Fell in love with my job	I quit, there is only so much shit you can deal with from people.
A healthy year, no visits to the hospitals, well at least for me.	Saw me getting diagnosed with G.E.R.D, got into an accident which basically renders my bike un-ride able at the moment
Saw me spend my new years with just one person I knew	This year sees me spend my new years with guys I have known for a decade.
Finally got my engineering degree.	Got my diploma in Business Management. (Though am 95% sure that I am going to flunk my accounts paper big fucking time this time)
Wanted to go to office every single day	Didn't feel like going to office, even for an hour.

 

What I am looking forward to in the year 2009?

Well, let's see, passing accounts would be top priority, getting myself a job which I loved as much as the last one would be next. Going to Hyderabad for new years, seems like we guys haven't hung out together since the dark ages. Let's see how the party goes, though honestly I feel that if there are women involved the party is going to suck big fucking time, because there are just way too much of egos involved and I don't think that enough water has gone under the bridge for some unknown variable to be introduced into the equation and then a night long dissection taking place. Just want to go there and unwind.

I want the year 2009 to be like year I have no parallels with. A brand new beginning, a brand new life, none of the past shit, the word none here is all encompassing.

Slumdog Millionaire

Just finished watching the movie, and I am compelled to write this. I have no idea why, but never has the theme music of KBC been so uplifting. Danny Boyle after 'Full Monty' does it again, I mean Slumdog Millionaire was probably the 2^nd movie this year which got the reviews which probably made me doubt its brilliance just like 'The Dark Knight', but both the movies stand up to all the things which are written about it and the things which are not said about the movie.

Personally I loved the youngest version of Jamal, there was this certain sense of innocence in the guy's eyes which speak volumes, and throughout the first half I was expecting them to grow up to their present age, can't really help it when you have been born and brought up on Hindi masala movies. Though personally I feel there is something very irritating about Frieda Pinto / Latika, the female protagonist, same goes for the second young Jamal and Salim till the very end just wants to get his shit kicked out of him by you. Though I was honestly surprised on finding M.I.A's paper planes being part of the OST considering the fact that it is an A.R Rahman's project, but what the hell…

The movie is Lagaan meets KBC meets Breakaway. Never has a movie so dark and depressing been such a feel good movie. And the whole movie I kept thinking how Dev Patel actually reminds me of Vishnu, I am not sure why exactly maybe because of his diction or body language or because I knew exactly where he would have jumped up and down and wet himself like a year old in pig-tails whose name almost sounds alike to Parvathy Omnakuttam (or however the fuck you call/spell her name). But fuck, the movie is depressing as hell but the KBC score in the end lifts your spirits so high which I am sure is not because of the bottle of cognac I just finished. Anil Kapoor is this grey character you can't really put your finger on and say this is who he was in the movie.

The movie is worth watching not just because of its depressing-dark-bringing-tears-to-my-eyes-joy but also for the last montage in rewind.

Do me some more Emotional Atyachar!

O! mere Patna Presley's...this is what adores my desktop right about now, and for a long time to come now...



Never has a single teaser for a movie driven me to such extents! I know I am going to hate the movie, I know I am going to expect a lot from it, but what the hell, the teasers so far is like the first kiss you ever had, you are not thinking of dipping your pinky in her dinky...but the more you keep kissing and petting, the more you want to do the funk and the first time always is not as what you had expected, the second time it is almost euphoric... Dev D and its Emotional Atyachar is just like that...Will go and buy some rubber just to be all prepared...

Karan Arjun

Watching Karan Arjun on TV after ages, and every single time I watch one of these movies it just takes me on an emotional roller coaster rides. The movie still excites me, as I want find myself smiling and cheering Karan and Arjun to beat the crap out of the villains, as I still find me singing along to all the songs (I still remember majority of the lyrics). There are few things in life which get me excited like movies, and I have to say this was probably the golden period of Hindi cinema. Masala movies ruled the roost, defied logic, defied every single psychical and meta-psychical law ever formulated and created by man. The true definition of escapist cinema, I am pretty sure a lot of people would find themselves ridiculing these movies now, or find it below their standards to accept the fact that these are the movies they rooted for when they were growing up, it is something like Macarena, you know you did the Macarena when the song came out, though now you would just shrug yourself in embarrassment till they wither away.

Anyway, let me jump around and air-sword fight some more now, the ads got over, and the villains have realized that Karan Arjun are back in town to avenge their death. This is AWESOME!

 

Ps: Will try and recap the year gone by sometime soon, hopefully before the new year.

 

Silver Lining

There is a silver lining after all. Well, to really see and appreciate the glimmer of the shiny silver beaming around the ragged edges of the dark clouds, you really have to get to know these dark clouds, really well. And there were just too many 'really's in the previous sentence. Anyway, coming back to the dark clouds, dark cloud #1, I quit my job, actually the quitting bit was the easiest and the only job I have done in the last one month. There comes a time in your life, well actually you get couple of these cross roads, where one road takes you places but you really are miserable and the other one you are not sure but you know you will be proud of yourself. No points for guessing which path I took. I really was never to take shit, and even though I have been searching for a job now, for quite some time now actually, in the current scene, the jobs just seem to have dried up, but then again, not the one to be worried about anything.

Dark cloud #2, met with an accident, 2 days after I quit my job, busted my knees, just skidded short of breaking my legs. But if only I could take a video of the fall, it would definitely made into the archives of 'Worlds most awesome videos', while skidding along with the bike, I saw sparks and all coming from the bike, but honestly the sparks did not really look as awesome as the ones I saw in a movie on TV the previous night, maybe it was cause of the early sunlight from dawn.

Well, there are others as well but then I don't really feel like talking about them at this point of time. So coming back to the silver lining looks like 'DEV D' finally looks to release. And man whatte a video, whatte video…Patna Presley's. I just hope that this movie gets Abhay Deol and Anurag the recognition they deserve, 'Oye Lucky! Lucky Oye!' was just plain awesome, 'No smoking' was a eye opener, but none of them quite got the recognition which they deserved, reminds me of my own story. Breaking my head over learning accounting, and trust me never have I encountered a more sorry subject in my life. I mean compared to accounts, electrical and electronic subjects during my engineering seem like hot brunette (not really a blonde fan) twins lying spread eagled shouting out my name to ravage their nubile, flexible bodies till I am famished and I can't raise the flag to be hoisted anymore. Accounts is like that old uncle, who is reserved, sad, grumpy who you intentionally avoid and you know if you get engaged in a conversation with him, you will in all certainty lose your sanity and grow old and die a virgin. I guess, now I actually get as to why women find bankers to be such bores, and why bankers find it so hard to get laid. All beginning to make sense now…

Anyway, have to go now have a bid adieu to my sex life. :'(

Fucking emotional attyachar!

Classifieds

Wanted - A house mate & a true Spartan!

Three Spartans (Software Engineers who are into marketing, market research and programming respectively) are currently residing in Sparta, a lovely cozy two bedroom apartment in GM Palya. It is their desire for greater friendship from across the terror torn Asian land of India that makes them search far and wide for one more of their kind.

Sparta, our fully furnished two bedroom palace is at a distance of 1.1km from BEML gate and 2km from Indira Nagar 80 feet Road. As you approach our territory you will see our inviting (Blue and white, in true Greek colors) five storied apartment to your right. In the centre of the covered car parking which houses an armory of cars and bikes, is positioned the lift that can take you to the second floor and to our palace.

Come right in and fall onto our plush sofas and catch your latest match or sitcom on our 29" TV. Rest royally, as we warriors do, on our diwan set while you watch the latest movies on our home theatre setup in the living room. Rest your worries and tired brains on our rich bolsters and cushions and your inventory on our engraved glass table. Or even enjoy blissful moments of solace in dim light on our Persian carpet! The carpet is not aimed at hiding the beautiful floor, beautiful with shades of white on the clear tiles all around the house.

As you walk into Sparta from the living room, you will reach the cross roads - the dining courtroom, with wooden pathways to the royal chamber, chamber of chief of guards, the food factory and the royal balcony! Eat, drink and make merry with your fellow Spartans on our round glass table on stranded legs adorned with pleasant table mats and a bottle of strong Argentine Inca wine in the centre. Brighten or dim the light according to the mood and let the ambience reflect off the freshly laid curtains to provide you a feast worthy of the kings.

Take a stroll in the royal balcony and glance upon your subjects as you are caressed by the fresh misty air blowing from the west with whispers of comfort and laden with care. Get back to enter the food factory complete with the works. The wooden factory, complete with artistic cabinets and racks comprises a four stove compartment and gas connection to ensure happy days ahead. Drink safe with our water purifier and heat up food in our microwave. Mix it up with our mixie and refresh yourself with some fruits using the fresh juice maker. Whatever you can't finish and for storing your food and beverages, stock it all onto our big fridge and come back for more later.

The palatial rooms are on opposite sides of the cross roads. The master bedroom is truly fit for the kings alone. Come home to see how you can sleep under the starry skies and on the softest of beds. The lazy curtains are meant to stand in the way of the sun so as to ensure your lazy sleep is uninterrupted by forces of nature. Complete with a personal royal balcony and white tiled bathroom, this is indeed a place in the clouds and for the kings.

The other room is equally classy. With a shade of blue on the walls and the curtains, the room soaks in the early rays of the sun and is a delightful resting place. Both the double bedrooms complement and contrast each other. The rest room for this room also adjoins itself to the cross roads and a separate wash basin aids the diners as well.

Should you feel interested to live like us and with us kings, let us know at the earliest for tonight we dine in hell!

All European messengers may please contact kurian@gmail.com or on the following numbers: 0045 69 60 40 12 or 0045 27 89 33 40.

All Persian messengers may please contact don.osiris@gmail.com or on the following numbers: 0091 98 86 72 08 69 or 0091 80 42 03 69 19.

Looking forward to some meaty conversations, earth and water.

Your King,
Leonidas

The one where I get married to Kurian

Or was at least advised to. Recently moved into my new place, which would put a lot (NO! make that all) of the bachelor pads to shame. The house which after 4 days of shopping and cleaning and setting the interiors now is something which I am proud to call home. I can go on and on about how awesome my place is, but you would have no idea till you actually drop in, which if you do, you can either plonk yourself on leather couches, let your feet rest on Persian carpet with a coffee cup to be placed on the coffee table, while flicking through the channels brought to you by the massive home theatre system. While I am in the loo marveling at the flush, you would wonder why I am so enamored by the flush, but if you have been to Shri Hari 202 (the place where I stay in Mumbai), you will quite understand my fixation with a powerful flush, and you wander around waiting for me to stop looking at the flow of water in awe, you step into my room going through the neatly placed wardrobe and my workstation, and you sit on the bed which gently curves and bends against your curves, you are surprised to see curtains and floor mats, place mats on the table, on the centre a bottle of fine red wine, the color of the curtain gently blending in with the color of the walls, you go to the kitchen because all the multi colors are making you hungry and you open the fridge not expecting to be filled with food, drinks, milk, vegetables, you open the other cupboards and you find herbs and spices, some of them you have never heard of and you find your knees getting weaker by the minute, and I finally step out of the loo with a big grin on my face, putting a 6 year old who just got his favorite present from Santa Claus on Christmas eve, and I show you the marvel of the lighting of the dining room.

You are surprised to see all these things in my place, and you have a sneaking suspicion if there is a woman's touch somewhere, and I gently hug you from behind assuring you that there is none, and that what you see is what you get and you are thinking to yourself that all this is too good to be true. Well, if you ask me, it is too good to be true, a sweet place for 13k odd and you add in another 13k and you find a place which has the Spartan stamp all over, it is a bit like getting a car customized by Dilip Chabria really.

Now I understand that there are some people (yes you s/w techie :P) who would get jealous when I tell them about the amount of shopping we have done in the last 3 days, and setting the place up which is fit for a Spartan king (me) and his commander (Kurian). And they suggested that Kurian and I should get married, but then that would be illegal on almost 10 raised to power 'n' where n tends to infinity counts. Firstly because, Kurian happens to be my foster father, he also happens to be my Spartan Captain (and you must be quite aware of the rule about relationships with your colleagues).

Let me not ramble on now, will try and post some pictures, but I sincerely suggest you guys to drop in and hear the Onida devil's voice playing at the back of your head. Also have to start studying, apart from the ongoing war between my boss and me I am assuming that I would be visiting this place less often, and completely not in the month of January. Have exams on every single Sunday of January which means that not only the whole month of January fucked for me, my new year is also fucked, as in royally fucked. Oh! BTW, if you guys know any openings for a qualitative market researcher, let me know. Though I would now like to spend most of time at home, but if the job requires relocation you would find me leaving at a moment's notice. Let me know.

Also will ask V to try and send me pictures she took from my Mumbai visits, though not sure if she will send them across, and will try and put up a video of a tour through my house. Oh! BTW it felt nice talking to you, it's been ages, I know you don't read this page much with all the work and all, but looking forward to you coming down sometime soon. Miss you baby (hehehehhe, I know I still got the groove baby).

• Athul

It has been a long

Long, long past couple of days. What was supposed to be a week filled with kick ass work soon got mauled and raped by guys of my age with shit loads of ammunition. Though the majority of my travel was filled with following the news from my hotel room and ordering room service, I did manage to celebrate Mainak's birthday, not in style but in fun. There are a lot of things which I wanted to talk about, like the slew of bodies being stacked up by unknown number of people, wanted to talk about how much fun it is always is to travel and how much it sucks when you travel with no money, how there are these extremely hot looking but dumb and blonde beyond all recognition women in fancy designer suits loitering around the airport, how I have a big, nice raging hangover, how I want to get to the place where all these people in their power suits and black berries are, how I want to get some action fast (been close to a long assed week with no action). I mean there are just too many things I want to talk about, but at the same time I want to keep quiet, and maybe one of the big reasons is that maybe I have spoken about them before and I don't feel like talking about them. Though there is one thing which I would want to talk about, trying to distract myself from the news ticker running on the tv at the airport lounge is trying to convince you people to go watch 'Oye! Lucky, Lucky Oye!', and as always my predictions are bang on target, the movie is worth every single hard earned, stolen, borrowed money you can get your hands on to buy the tickets for this movie.

The movie is trip through nostalgia, at least for me, with the culture, the dialect of the proper Delhi oozing out of every single frame, right from the diction, to the attitude of people (who may end up as your neighbors, peers and co-workers), to the 'I am king and I own everything you see' attitude. I suppose not a lot of people who have not been privy and blessed enough experience at least 8 months of life in Delhi, the humor, the sad, ironic humor will get lost on you. But still, you have to watch it, mainly because the borderline personality chuth that I am, just got a new character for the next few weeks. And there are a load of character nuances which are already present and there are some which need to be included, should be a fun couple of weeks being Lucky.

Anyway, my mouth feels weird, well mainly because I don't think I brushed my teeth yesterday, or today for that matter, and I haven't had my morning sip of Pepsi which I am seriously contemplating stopping to consumption of aerated drinks, mainly because of the severe heart burn it gives my already corroded esophagus, (for those of your in the dark it is like cap on the bottle doesn't work, the contents which are supposed to stay inside the bottle once you pour it and close the cap comes back up through the neck, and considering the amount of acid which any ones system generates due to the excessive drinking one does, it should be least surprising), I am thinking once I check into the new hotel I still would not be able to brush because I do not carry a tube of paste with me, and not just any paste will do, I need a paste which is in gel form, you know the 'Close Up' kind not the 'Colgate' kind, I like my mouth to be feeling fresh, one never knows when some bovine woman thinks I look like the nymph god Adonis and decides to bite a piece of me. Though considering my hygiene and idiosyncratic routine and habits I don't see myself getting any now at the airport or in the near future anytime soon. Though it never really stops me from thinking about it anyway, which is good I suppose, I could you be a brand ambassador for the infallible of the human hope or something, and if hope is not available, then I could be a prime candidate for stupidity, moron-ness.

Man, I am just bored, probably when I wake up after the flight and I check into the flight I have to start working and send across this document which I should have sent across to the client about 2 days back, but did not, I can be so insensitive sometimes that it almost scares me, but then again I am 'Dilliwala'.

Note – What you should take from this post is that 'Oye Lucky! Lucky Oye!' is an AWESOME movie way more awesome than the idea of a threesome, no actually make that foursome (1 guy and remaining girls, experience has taught me that you have to be specific when it comes to things like these, women tend to twist things like these to their own convenience) .