Wednesday, 27 February 2008

Am a Prick!!!

Definite indicative signs that I am a prick and I am progressing to the becoming a prick of a higher dimension. One of my friends was generally talking to me about something he did and he felt good about and being the dick I am, acted a proper prick. Btw does that rhyme or is it just me losing it?

Nice Guy: i shaved my body hair and it looks pretty
Me: WHAT??? WHY???? you are not tryin to change into pricess leia are you?
Nice Guy: cuz i was getting sickk of that long busy body hair and gals here dont like that here.. and it so happens i have a pretty decent body
Nice Guy: no sagging boobs and paunchy abs.. my chest is pretty decent
and i like it :)
Me: and you really think I wanted to know that cos your meatloafy chest used to run infront of me eyes a la baywatch???
am sure you like it... you metrosexual asshole
Nice Guy: well just letting u know thats all
me: hehehehehe
this is going to be so much fun isn it
Nice Guy: in case u were dreaming abt it
what is ?
me: you and the other girls exchanging tips and tricks on whaich wax and shit to use?
but how did you shave/wax/i donno wat to your body hair?
Nice Guy: now thats not gonna happen... i dint wax it dude and guys here do it all the time
i just used an electric razor... as simple as that...
me: am sure they do it all the itme... and there is a reason why the gay marriages are legal down there?
Nice Guy: cough cough elcome to cross culture learning....
me: and now you are goin to write a book on the 8 simple rules on how to keep your body hair less?
Nice Guy: why not... maybe i can add a few lessons from u on how to be a prick
me: dude don fuckin talk abt cross culture learnin to me
i was learning cultures when you still poppin shit in your diapers
now you are talking
but seriously
Nice Guy: yea and that was the culture u were learning...
aka my ass
me: something must have triggered this shit
i mean being impulsive is my kinda thing...
you think too much... then what happened?
am sure am missing something here
Nice Guy: i told u.. i was sick of it.. i have been wanting to do it all the time.. i find shy to take my shirt of after games because i ahve too much hair and shit...
now i am cool... im not ashamed of my body
im not fat or ugly
and i can walk shirt less and wont look bad at all
and im working on maintaining a good body also... so hopefully it comes out well... but trust me it is so cool
me: right now all i feel like singing is you are beautiful no matter what they say
am sure it is
Nice Guy: dude... u dont have to be gay to shave body hair man... wake up and try to walk with the world
me: dude
Nice Guy: its hygeine too
me: and you don have to shave your hair to be comfortable in your skin
Nice Guy: well its relative
me: hygiene? aren you talkin to the wrong person?
wats relative?
Nice Guy: i dint like my body hair man... kinda felt like think-am-smart-chuth
that u dont have to comfortable shit that i said
and i know the gals dont like body hair here
me: so?
Nice Guy: so i dont my gal to feel icky man...
me: are you goin to be somebody who tries to please other people or try and get other people to please you?
Nice Guy: oh pls .... get over it will u
me: dude
you know it
i know it
the lord hath spoken the truth
Nice Guy: i did i because i like it.... we all do things because others will appreciate it... and i wanted to do it for myself too
and thats the bottom line
i just realised talking to u abt it was a mistake
shuld ahve kept quiet
me: hehehe
Nice Guy: get back to ur work and i will to mine
good nite
me: jus trippi on you dude
from when did you start gettin so touchy
am sorry
i know i pushed it a bit
Nice Guy: from the day i was crapping on my diapers
cmon man wtf...
me: lol
Nice Guy: everything was cool except for that last line u madce
that ticked me off
anyway chuck it.. im gonna get back to watching hollow man 2...
will catch ya later

I donno why I have to be a jerk just for fuck's sake? And no that is not an open ended question. I know a million people have their own reasons as to why I act the way I do, ranging from my father, to all the girls I have been with, to why hiroshima and nagasaki were fucking nuked. Think, I know the answer. =) Thank you very much. And the Don has left the building.

1 comment:

Californication said...


Too Much Free Time.