The year is coming down to an end. Its been a mixed year. Have had the most interesting turn of events this year, but at the same time I haven moved an inch since last year.
Start of the year: Starting back from exactly a year back from now. Dumped. Started fishing for fishes in the pond.
New year 2007: Probably the first time all the boys were there together. Adhy was with Edna, Gopal with hehehehe... Charan was single as usual (but congratulations boy, you have no gloriously joined the Men's club... my Boy got lucky with a firang.).
Broke up with my date of new years after 2 weeks. (Reasons undisclosed. But for the curious want to know everything people. I was a jerk and a bastard.)
3rd week of Jan: Start a new relationship with my ex's brother's crush. But not before I cheat on her with one of people I had a crush long arse time back. The first time I did not feel bad after cheating on a woman. What can I say? I was getting bastardized.
Feb: being the shortest month, I don't really remember much of it.
March: Was getting really fucked around. Denial, Anger phase of grief.
April: Got dumped by a 19 yr old, (for those who want to know why? well according to her, I did not have my priorities right.) Felt like ice cold water being splashed on my body on a cold Jan night when I plan to sleep in commando style.
May: Realize one of best friends was back to doing things which he does best. Stabbing people in the back. Spoke about it. Gave another chance we spoke about it a bit. But things never been the same. Write my Degree Stopping Paper. AGAIN. by this time I am dallying with this girl in B lore. Move to B lore, start work in the new company. Things don't feel right from the very start in the new company. Break up with the girl. I was a bastard again. But I was starting to get real bad.
June: My birthday. Work for 16 hours. Lose my phone. Get drunk till 5 in the morning. Make an ISD call, cry, and surprise surprise! sink into the bath tub at 0430hrs in the morning, still drinking. Rest of the month is uneventful.
July: Get introduced to How I met your Mother!. Make whole load of friends. Andy, Lavina, Francis, Maria. These are the people I did not fuck around with in the month of July. Met a lot of people. Had a lot of one night stands. Was hoping one of them would culminate into a relationship filling up this void in me. But in the morning when am going back home, I think " who the fuck am I kidding?"
August: Screw with a friend's friend who happens to be another guys girlfriend. Feel awfully bad. But in my defense I did think there was something between us. Though its a different issue after the sex it was not there any longer. Well there was Julie, Carolina, Stephanie, Lisa, Anjali, Monica, Sneha, the others I don't remember their names. I realized that the company I was working for was running a scam. So I quit. Start at home thinking about what I really wanted to do. Got a window. Jumped in.
September: Started work in the new company. Finally for a brief moment felt that life was falling back into place. Was finally feeling happy.
October: Well. This was when somebody said " surprise me!!!". Felt like a jackass. An idiot. Still feel like one.
November: When my Bi-polar starting kicking in. Basically felt like a woman having periods. Yes ladies I understand your pain. But do me a favor don't talk about it.
December: Am still stuck at the depression, acceptance phase. Been binge drinking like there is no tomorrow. Loving every bit of it. Have forgotten the # of times I have had to throw up the booze I have drank. Haven't yet decided if I want to spend my new years alone or go out!!!
But hopefully things should brighten up this new year. I have had an eventful year. It had all the works.Sex, Booze, Love, Hate, Betrayal, the whole Shakespeare spectrum of emotions. I started off this year as a nice guy. Turned into a bastard. Turning back into a nice guy.
Though I would like to apologize to all the people I have wronged this year. I would never had done something like that ever, and I promise the things I did to you I will not do it anybody else.
I would like to thank all the people who dumped me. I thank you for opening my eyes and letting me know that i was such a wimp.
I would like to thank my mother and father. My mother for being such lovely pain in the ass who managed to save my ass when I was in trouble. And well father. Lets not talk about him (different issue haven't spoken to him in over a year.)
i would like to mention that, I still fucking hate my brother. ( If you are reading this rajkumarji, I want you to know that, You are an asshole. You can cry all you want, but the day you get over the line am going to whoop your ass so bad, forget about ever opening your eyes again, and listen your father ain't going to come and save your ass, he is scared of me. Capiche? So watch your step bitch, cos if you don't you going to trip over to your grave!!! )
To the person am seeing right now. I appreciate your patience. I really do. I apologize for being nasty and mean. But all those things I said, at some level are true. Though they are not so exaggerated as I put them. And I appreciate it, if after new years I would like to get some time on my own. Thanks.
And before I forget. Happy new year.