Monday, 3 December 2007

Sometimes

Sometimes, you really wonder what others are running through their heads. Sometimes you wish you could comprehend their way of thinking. Sometimes, you wish people could read our mind, while other times you are glad they can't. Sometimes you think things that make sense and seem logical, yet they seem so childish and self-centered. Sometimes you wish things didn't turn out the way they did, but you don't know how things would be different otherwise. Sometimes you wish things would go your way, but still you know that it's not very fair. Sometimes you wish that people never change, and yet sometimes you wish they do. Sometimes you wish that people are just the way you see them - in thoughts, in speech, in actions. However, that isn't always so. Sometimes you wish you were more eloquent with words, so that you wouldn't keep saying the wrong things that people would mistaken their meanings. Sometimes you wish you were all alone in the world, so that no one would hurt you and you would also be able to hurt no one. But still, sometimes you wish you were not all alone, as it sometimes feels. Sometimes you wish that your world would be perfect, yet you know that hardship builds friendships and character. Sometimes you wish that you knew everyone in the world personally, and sometimes you just want to keep to yourself. Sometimes you wish that that someone is always there, yet you know that it would not be very considerate of you. Sometimes you wish you can just stop bothering and caring about the world, and yet sometimes you wish you had the ability to care about everything and everyone at the same time. Sometimes you wish that people would interact harmoniously and happily with each other, and sometimes you wish they would include you too. Sometimes you seem to stand at the top of the world with the people you love, and sometimes you feel left behind in their shadowed trails. Sometimes you know and understand that people need you, but that doesn't stop you from wondering and agreeing that someone better could just take your place - in terms of relationships. Sometimes you know that you matter, and sometimes you really don't think you actually do. Many a times you're contented with being just yourself, knowing how fortunate just the way you are - holding both sides of a coin in your hands. Yet, when one side meets the other, it sometimes just seems that everything falls out of balance. Sometimes you wonder why is it that people don't give when all they seem to do is take from you. Sometimes you wish that you knew the future, yet perhaps you're thinking that it's better that you cannot. Many a times you know that all that matters is what people mean to you, although you can't stop wishing that you knew what you mean to them to. Sometimes it's not the words that really conveys the spirit, sometimes it's just the attitude that you observe when people interact. Sometimes you wonder what would happen if the world knew what you're thinking, sometimes you wonder what the world is thinking. Sometimes you wonder what people say and type about you when you are not there, sometimes you wish you had never known.

Sometimes you can just close your eyes and put yourself in the warmth embrace of another, yet when you do, you wonder why the surrounding air is so chilly. Sometimes you wish you could stop feeling like such a hypocrite, and sometimes you just wish the tears would stop. Sometimes you just want to tell everything to someone, and yet you worry about how he/she would think of you after you did. Sometimes you wish people would stop judging other people and also themselves. Sometimes everything just seems so futile, and that history seems to be repeating itself. Sometimes you just wish that you had a shell that you can withdraw into, and sometimes you wonder that the people who knock, what are they really thinking about. Sometimes it seems so unfair and childish to be thinking certain things - as others point out to you. But in the end, you realize that what you were worrying about had come true. Sometimes you really wonder if some people just never learn, yet you also understand that they are only human. Sometimes you see others walking down a path that hurts you and would hurt the other parties in time, as it has happened. Yet you also know that you cannot dictate that other people feel and how they behave. Sometimes you can just be contented with what you have, and sometimes you just wish that the world and its people belonged to you - so they can stop hurting you and also themselves. Sometimes, you just know that your thinkings are ridiculous and childish, and sometimes you wish you can stop thinking and wishing so many things.

Sometimes you think its 'funny' how some people just never learn, yet you wonder that maybe they didn't even care. Sometimes you wish the world would know what you're on about, yet sometimes you don't even know what you yourself are thinking.

1 comment:

anN-series said...

sadness again...not liking the present state of zenmaster's mind...(however there is nothing i can do abt it)..but must say it does brings out the best in ur posts