Excerpts from the book am working on:
"Well, the first thing which comes to my mind when I think about a book, is something bound not in the S&M way and has pages in it, now am not sure if it has pictures in it, no actually am pretty sure it doesn't have pictures in it, no matter how cool I may try to project myself, am a geek and a nerd. And i have been told that am a good looking one at that , think people are getting myopic these days. I also ventured into writing a book, but then i finish writing couple of chapters and then i junk it. Cos i think its shit. Which in total honesty is usually is. Well what can I say".
Alan was again holding court with his wife and her friend who somewhere down the line became his friend too. Funny how things work out in life Alan was thinking to himself.
"So after a couple of disastrous attempts at writing a book, he has decided to try yet again. Maybe he will get bored and give up after a few chapters but maybe this will be that one book that he finishes writing. He knows what this one's going to be about and he has the entire story mapped out in my head or so he claims. This time he does have a reason, something that makes me want to get up everyday and live my life. Now's definitely a good time him to try his hand at writing again". Marie was finishing off Alan's flow of thought, in a way only people who know each other well enough and long enough manage to.
"Or maybe not" Alan continued. "I mean there are times when I just get put off by the sight of books, I mean look at this shit around you". Amanda figured that the interior decorator of this place was inspired by cadburys or something. "I mean look at this" pointing at whole load of books, "leather bound which I think is not even leather its just some cheap arse cardboard which looks like leather but it is actually not. There is just so much of brown in the whole place it looks like shit either ways. But what can i say, shitty colors do make a good conversation topic. They do serve good food here." As the server came about to refill their wine glasses. Again.
"Weirdly enough I love the feel of the whole place. The entire decor is made to look like a living room with a fire place and all. And it actually makes me feel warm and safe. And even though the wood does look like the interior decorator got his inspiration from cadburys, I like it. But then again it could just be my weird obsession with chocolates and how a piece of chocolate can and does make a person feel better when they re depressed" Marie now pointing a finger at Alan "And that my friend is a proven fact". Amanda knew this entire routine by now. Marie would start talking about how she hates fruits and nuts and how Alan thinks its preposterous for anybody not to like hell love something so divine as fruits and nuts.
As the wine from the 5th bottle was being poured, "But you know what?" said Alan with a slight lisp and taking a long drag from his cigarette. "You should NOT try and read a book when you are drunk, I mean you can read a book when you are drunk, but not when you know you are drunk drunk. Bad idea. At least for me, I get these weird arse heart burns. I feel like a pregnant woman then, though am not really sure how a pregnant woman feels like" as he quietly slid his hands into Marie's without missing a beat "But the fact that I get heart burns when am drunk and am trying to read a book is a bit gay I think and therefore the whole pregnant woman thing" trying to pull the raised eyebrow down on Amanda.
As Marie went back to the whole chocolate bit trying to underline her point and gain some momentum "So when people first started making chocolates, it was only chocolate...It dint have any fruits or nuts or mint (sticking her tongue out) mixed in it for a reason... Coz they re chocolates...And please for the love of god keep your chocolates and your fruits and nuts seperate... Its bad enough that people like nuts but to mix them in chocolates is sacrilage..... I dont know when exactly i started hating most nuts actually make that all dry fruits and most fruits.... Was I born that way or did something happen when I was very young, I mean it has to be when i was young because i really do not remember.... But I think me not liking nuts is better than people not liking whipped cream... " and that may just about explain the connection between chocolates Alan and Marie.
Alan loves the ones which have loads of fruits and nuts in it, Marie hates them. As Alan was busy rolling his eyes in his mind thinking "I can not believe there are people "I" know who abs-bloddy-loutely hate fruits and nuts! But it is good in a way, I don't have to be all mushy and caring and say you want some? and then watch Marie devour all which is mine, now I can just offer them knowing fully well that they won't eat it. Well what can I say am a cheap bastard. " As Alan suddenly snapped back to reality with the smug grin on his face which only a person laughing and smiling on his own sense of humor gets.
Alan now considerably drunk begins to think aloud "Nuts are awesome though, esp when they are sucked or so I have been told, I would like to get my nuts sucked and then I can tell if they are actually a nice feeling or no". Winks at Marie and laughing uncontrollably. "Anyway, I don't understand the reason as to why people actually evolve a sense of dislike to fruits and nuts, I mean am sure we are not in medieval times where they were inserted into people's orifices as some kind of punishment. I mean there is a reason why I think I was a spartan, a naughty one at that and why I hate Radishes. Because as history goes, that greeks who used to indulge in adultery, used to get Radishes shoved up their behinds with a mallet. I mean seriously just thinking about it gives me a pain and I think I may be confusing that with my feeling to just go shit, am not sure! and the radishes in those times were bigger, fatter and more pointier. Poor me, because am pretty sure that before I married my queen, and marched 300 of my finest men to the battle gates and made a god king bleed. I was a very busy man." Winks at Marie again, its one of their private games they play, where he winks and she blushes and Amanda rolls her eyes. "But am still not sure about fruits and nuts. Coming to think of it, people who don't like fruits and nuts kind of get constricted to what can be eaten off each others bodies kinda sad ain't it?. " Laughing at the last remark he made, laughing because he thinks he was smart enough to let one sneak through Marie's defences, only to realize that this fell flat on his face as she pulled her hand away from his and started talking.
"Well for starters people who dont like fruits or nuts always have the option of whipped cream or chocolate sauce which is so much better than any fruit or nut and im sure it ll feel a lot better as well.... And comin to think of it, radish is not a fruit.... And me being the myopic person I am or so Im told looking menacingly at Alan, I dont believe in adultry...Im a very one man woman and I dont understand others who indulge in it either..... For me, its all about the emotional bond I form with the other person.... Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong centuary... In a world where monogamy is fast disappearing, it scares me sometimes to have these age old values... I still believe in the whole concept of soulmates and there s one person for everyone and now that I ve found my one man, I believe in it even more.... What can I say, Im just a romantic at heart who lives in her own fantasy world.... " letting one go at Alan where it hurts the most. But Alan knows that he asked for this, and was trying hard to salvage the situation .
"I love fantasay worlds. Its the same one where I am Spartan with a family pack, the super cool super genius guy who everybody wants to be like him, this the place where I get to be Neo, who has his own bat-mobile, and can curse like its the coolest thing on this planet earth and when all shit is happening slowly and coolly light up my smoke. Think I should write a book about this fantasy world of mine. But maybe not, because I hate it when people take upon themselves to break my bubble, well i got something to say to you, FAFU. Well thats one of the few words I picked up in the past couple of days. There are few more, and you are always welcome to hear them out, on one condition, you gotta make me scream" he winks again at Marie "If you know what I mean, and I don want you to pinch me, poke me or throw sheep at me, yes, Dammit. You are not original. Though am pretty sure you can think of other ways which I will approve of" again the smug crooked grin spreading across his face as love spread in the time of cholera.
"Will playing Metallica make you scream?" Marie asked with a wicked twinkle in her eyes. "Cos apparently it makes people wake up in a good mood... Ok so shoot me if I thought of other very creative ways to wake up my husband and then had my little bubble burst when i was told to wake him up by playing Metallica.... Pfffbt.... For a girl who woke up every morning to soothing music, the smell of coffee, its a little difficult to imagine that someone would actually voluntarily wanna wake up listening to Metallica... Sometimes Im suprised that 2 people who can be so radically different can be so much in love with each other..... Sure we have our fights and they get nasty but at the end of the day I know whatever happens, nothing can change the way we feel about each other... I guess the opposites attract theory holds good, atleast it did for us.....
As both Alan and Marie squeezed each-others hands just to pass some message which only couples who know each other well or long enough can do. But there was a time when they did not know each other well enough or long enough. And they were trying times.